Little Yaois
by YumiKiryu
Summary: Little songs, really short fics, etc. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

I was just listening to Christmas music and thought of these parodies. Enjoy!

Me no own!

The first one. Original song: Grandma got run over by…. Now my turn.

Zero got plowed into by a Kaname

Coming out the shower this Christmas Eve

You can say there's no such thing as Yaoi

But that's not what all these fangirl (and boys) believe!

Repeat!

The second one! Original song: I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus! Now mine!

I saw Zero kissing Ka-na-me

Underneath the mistletoe last night

Oh, what a laugh it would have been if Yuuki walked right in

Seeing Zero kissing Ka-na-me!

Repeat!

Third one! Original song: I heard the bells on Christmas day! My turn!

I heard moans on Christmas day

It sounded like someone was getting laid

Loud and husky they repeat

Fuck him good and fuck him hard

Repeat!

Fourth one! Original song: I want a hippopotamus for Christmas! Me!

I want a KanZeropotamus for Christmas

Only a KanZeropotamus will do

I don't want any Yuri and No Aido too

I want a KanZeropotamus to watch them play and have fun

Repeat!

Over!

Lol, I know some suck but no bashing in reviews it actually took a while for me to think of these. 

And now when ever you hear these songs you can enjoy them, more!

R&R please.


	2. How I Became A Yaoi Fangirl

This is how I found about Yaoi, cuz a few people asked me how I found it. I'm using my nickname -and my friends- cuz I don't feel like using my real one.

"Yumi-chan, Yumi-chan!" Miku, my best friend, yelled shoving her Dsi in my face. "Read this!" I took the little thing from her hands.

I stared blankly at the thing. Blackened Wing? "Out loud?" Miku nodded her head rapidly. "Alright." -It was chapter like 6 where they have sex in the bathroom stall- So I started to read the chapter and once it got to the part with Kaname entering Zero, I uh…kinda -not kinda I did- flinged the thing across the room, and yelled at Miku, "What the fuck was that!" She just giggled and went to pick up the unbroken -unbelievable because I threw it pretty hard- Dsi.

"You didn't have to throw it across the room." Miku scolded, sounding a lot like Kaname,-which made me mad, why I can't remember.- What I did made me laugh remembering it but then it turned into something I didn't think she do.

I glared at her -which I'm very good at- and snapped, "Whatever Kuran!"

She strolled to me and lightly said, smirking the whole time. She pushed me back onto her bed -not she and I are not les you'll understand in a sec. - and straddled my hips. "I would watch how you talk to me Kiryu-kun."

I lightly pushed her shoulders. "Come on Miku, I was just joking. Get off me!" She then lightly smacked my face.

"Don't talk to me like! I'll teach you manners, lonely Level E." That's it! I pushed her of me roughly. I reversed our positions and made a fake gun with my hands and pointed it at her head.

"That's enough, Kuran!" I then got up and walked to my bed, getting off of her's. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to bed." Later around twelve I made sure she was asleep and grabbed her Dsi and read the whole first nine chapters of Secrets in the Dark. I don't know if it was my imagination or it really happened but I think I heard a soft chuckle.

Still to this day I think my best friend planned what she did that day, so she wouldn't be alone in her Yaoi world and I really think I should thank her. Before this I use to hate Kaname still do alittle but now I'm fine with him. She is a Kaname fangirl and I'm a Zero fangirl, so some times we call each other Kuran and Kiryu.


	3. Druken

*bows* I'm so sorry I've been sick, for a very long time so I haven't got a chance to write anything. Please, forgive me, I'll try my best to get the next chapter of Zeroless and When the Rest of the World has Gone Mad out as soon as possible.

This story was created from when I was chatting with my bestie, and we were talking about how Zero would act if he was drunk. She thought he would be the sad type, were they are sad and they cry to everyone and tell them their problems, but I thought…..well you'll see.

Warning- Blow job, striping, lap dancing, pole dancing, underage drinking, and language. If any of this bothers you leave like now! I no own Vampire Knight…..sadly.

*grabs microphone and announces* I AM LOOKING FOR A BETA! IF ANY OF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE MY BETA, I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER! THANK YOU GOOD NIGHT!

Drunken

Zero's sliver head poked around the corner of the doorway to see his lover sitting at the table, a bottle of Everclear -95% alcohol- in his hand. The hunter didn't really like it when Kaname got drunk, it wasn't like he was violent of anything, its just it meant something bad happened. The younger boy took a large gulp and walked threw the doorway. Kaname's head shot up from his drink, his eyes fixing lustfully on his lover's amazing body. The pureblood licked his lips, sizing Zero up like a piece of meat. 'Oh, I'm so hitting that tonight.'

"Zeeeroooo! C-come over here!" The pureblood smiled, slurring almost all his words. Zero smiled worriedly. He sat down next to his bubbly lover, and started rubbing the pureblood's back reassuringly. He touched Kaname's forehead to his, and looked him in his sparkly crimson eyes. The hunter sighed.

"Kaname." He said his lover's name softly, gaining his attention. "What happened, is something wrong?" The pureblood's eyes grew serous for a second and then they clouded over again with lust and warmth. Kuran poked the hunter's chest lightly, and smirked.

"I'll tell you what's wrong. You weren't here when I," Kaname whispered into Zero's ear. "wanted to fuck your brains out." The pureblood teased, licking and sucking on the shell of the hunter's ear. Zero felt Kaname's horniness rolling off him in clouds. The ex-human gulped, knowing how sore he would be tomorrow. The brunette pulled back and handed Zero a whole bottle of Everclear. Zero's lavender eyes grew wide.

"Kaname, you know I don't drink." Zero pleaded. Even though the pureblood was drunk he was still as stubborn as a damn mule. The pureblood pouted and he pushed the bottle into his young lover's chest.

"Please, one drink. It won't kill you." Kaname begged. Zero sighed, popping the bottle open and taking a giant swig. After two more swigs the hunter was feeling very good, and very horny. Zero looked around for something and smiled drunkenly when he saw it.

The level 'D got up and dragged the chair right in front of the pole and turned on the C.D player. It sprang to life, playing 'Sex on Fire' by the Kings of Leon. The hunter closed his eyes listening to the music and tried to remember the first step to pole dancing. He reopened his eyes and faced the pole, his stronger hand gliding up and down the pole's surface before he grasped it.

Kaname's eyes grew wide and he scrabbled for the seat in front of the pole, his head between his legs starting to spring to life. The hunter let go of the pole and unbuttoned his white button down shirt slowly, and threw it off somewhere in the distance. Zero gripped the pole again, his arm extended out straight. His hand at head level, and his inner foot securely at the base of the pole. He allowed the music to claim his body and it moved into its own shape. His hips swaying, moving side to side, sexually. The hunter's body arched, his weight leaning back, but he still had a secure grip on the pole. His body now hanging away from the pole, moving his body in an "S" fashion and letting it sway sensuously to the music's tempo as he became one with its melody.

Kaname's eyes grew wide, he didn't know his shy, sweet Zero could ever do something so…..damn sexy! His body went back into a straight position. Zero stepped around the pole slowly, keeping his outer leg straight and in a swinging motion he let it swing out to the side, pivoting his inside foot. The level 'D's knee bending slightly as he had a turn. He then returned to his starting position, swaying his hips in unison to the music, then he brought his dominant leg up and hooked the pole.

Zero slowly ran his leg along the poles surface. He lowered his leg once more. Then he placed his outer foot down just behind the other foot. Zero brought his inside leg back up, and hooked it once more around the front of the pole. He moved in a serpent-like fashion, his mind consumed by the music. The sliverette swung around the pole. Kaname whistled, his tongue hanging out like a dog. The pureblood was now painfully hard and he knew soon he would blow his wad. Zero's back arched deeply. He arched backwards, his hand gliding lower to allow a deeper arch. The hunter's body slithered down into a squatting position, his groin arching forward several times before he crawled up the pole, again. Zero swayed away from the pole, and bow so his face was leveled with the pureblood's. His lavender eyes looking down to see how hard his lover was.

"Well, well." The hunter teased rubbing his hand lightly across the bulge in his lover's pants. That action was reward with a loud moan from the brunette. "It seems someone wants more. Hmm?" The pureblood whimpered as a response. Zero straightened and walked over to the kitchen table and picked up the bottle of Everclear and finished it off. He then took a chair and dragged it over to a near by wall. The hunter pointed to the seat. "Sit here." Kaname ran to the seat begging the hunter with his eyes to making the need between his legs stop. The ex-human slowly striped himself of his pants and then his boxers where next to go. A very naked Zero stood between his legs and leant his upper body forward, with his back arched and his ass up in the air.

Zero then moved back. His hands rubbing his chest slowly. His hands trailing down to his manhood and back up to his chest. The hunter turned around and rubbed his ass. A forbidden finger propping up his ass. The finger pushed threw his tight safety ring and plunged in and out of his ass. He then added a second finger. Zero suddenly stopped. He removed his finger from his ass. He then hovered his ass above Kaname's crotch, he kept himself balanced by putting his hands on the pureblood's thighs and rubbing them in little circles. The level 'D then also moved his ass in circles, like he was painting Kaname's package with his cheeks. The sliverette then sat lightly on his lover's lap. Switching to an up and down motion. Zero looked back at Kaname as he ground against his body. What he saw made him smile. His lover's eyes where glazed with lust, his head leaning against the back of the chair, and cute little noises passing his lips.

Zero sighed, thinking the pureblood had enough of this torture. The hunter got off his lover and knelt on his knees. He unzipped his lover's pants, and lowered his head to the weeping member. His tongue teasing the tip of Kaname's manhood. Then slowly taking his long length into his mouth. Licking and sucking roughly. His pink appendage licking the underside of the older vampire's cock. Loud moans broke their way through the pureblood's soft lips. Zero smiled when he felt his lover shiver. The ex-human moaned, vibrating the pureblood's very hard manhood. When Kaname felt the vibrations, he screamed out his lover's name. "Z-Zero!" Kaname's elegantly slim fingers threaded through Zero's soft silver hair. His fingers tightened into a death grip on Zero's head, making him immobile. The pureblood's hips bucking like a wild bull. Kuran came with a hoarse scream.

He came out of Zero mouth with a pop, and the hunter smiled. A little amount of his lover's jizz trickled down the corner of his mouth. "I love you Kaname." The pureblood scooped the hunter up and carried him into Zero's bedroom. The only thing you could hear was moans of pleasure and ecstasy.


End file.
